Getting a Jump on Things

Words cannot describe the joy that is shopping online for maternity clothes. I've run across some gems that are too good not to share.

Truly, what's not to love about a maternity jumpsuit? They do come a little sexier than this ensemble, but why squish your bubbly bits into a revealing jumpsuit when you could wear something more pajama-esque? I love it, what's more, the husband will love it. People will envy me. According to the style blogs, this is totally in right now. I'm on it. I'll meet you in maternity jumpsuit land people. Don't be late.

The Potty Blues

The time has come to see if we can make this potty thing happen for real. I cannot break the bank on diapers forever. LL used this plan to potty train her kid in TWO DAYS. I kid you not.
We started on Saturday. Here's a synopsis.

Day 1- Child pees in the toilet twice. Refuses to pee in the toilet seven times. Wets the bed during nap time. Pees on the couch. No poop.
Day 2- Child pees in the toilet four times. Refuses to pee in the toilet six times. Wets the bed during nap time. Pees in the stroller once. Poops herself. Nugget of poo rolls out of her pant leg onto the kitchen floor. Eats dirt (irrelevant). Learns that "an accident" is not a happy surprise we celebrate. Cries.
Day 3- Child pees herself twice within the breakfast hour. Again seems to think that an "accident" is a happy surprise. She will not be convinced otherwise. Pees in the toilet after I read her eight Elmo books. Fatigue sets in. I drop her off at LL's house.

Sorry guys, due to aforementioned perverts, there will be no more pictures of Ceci on her potty.

*UPDATE! Child pees herself twice in two hours at LL's house. Is now asleep in a diaper. I am open to suggestions! Is this child not ready?

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.

Hello, old friends.

Well hello, remember me? I'm the lady with the blog you used to read every now and then. And then I disappeared. I'd like to explain what happened, and maybe try blogging again.
So here goes, for those of you that don't spill their guts on a blog, let me explain something. You can look at the dashboard of your blog and see who's reading, and also, how they found you. It's neat, because you can see that people across the U.S. and the world have stumbled across your little patch of self-indulgence and stayed for a while. Cool right?
Anyway, many, many months back I wrote a post about potty training my daughter. I posted a goofy picture of Ceci standing over the potty, grinning and looking very proud of herself. She wasn't wearing any pants. I guess I'm an idiot, but it did not occur to me that this was a bad, no, a TERRIBLE idea.
So as I was looking at my blog dashboard many months back, I noticed that someone found my blog by searching the words "child crotch". And the Internet led them to a picture of my naked kid. And they looked at it for several minutes.
Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that this blog would open expose my child to a pedophile. But that's what I did. And I freaked out. I considered deleting the entire blog. I decided not to, because this blog has so many memories and stories and photos that mean a lot to me. I documented a lot of my life here, and I did not want to erase that. So I erased that picture of Ceci, of course, and took some time off. I don't want to go into the disgust and the hurt here. It's obvious, I guess. But I think I want to pick this up again, and be more prudent about what I share. What do you think?

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.

Hello, are you out there? I know I've been gone for a long time. There is a good reason why I disappeared, and I think I'd like to explain. I miss blogging, so stay tuned, I think I'm coming back. 

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.

New York, part I

Dear friends, as some of you may know, Matthew and I recently returned from a trip to New York. We saved our pennies for close to a year to travel to the big city and visit my dear friend Sam. Sam used to live in Bellingham, but moved away one year ago to be a big-shot television producer. 

I'd like to share our trip in a series of posts. I'm pretty rusty with the blogging so bear with me. 

I wish I could caption this photo with the "Chariots of Fire" theme music

Ceci did not sleep a wink on the redeye to JFK. We endured six hours of whining, giggling, and being kicked in the stomach. Nightmare. I gave her so many bottles in a desperate attempt to make her sleep that we were changing diapers nonstop. And yes, I still give my almost-two-year -old a bottle. She has a drinking problem and I'm an enabler.  

We were zombies that first day. We literally had no sleep till Brooklyn. Here we are at Dumbo park, between the Brooklyn and Manhattan Bridges. It's a beautiful place. Lots of boats and people to stare at. It was hotter than Hades all day and into the evening. Above you will see authentic New York Pizza. Delicious. 

Here is Sam, Ceci, and Sam's niece Adeline. 

Exhausted family photo. Ceci looks stunned. When I look at this picture I realize I inherited my face and the tendency to either blink or squint in every photo from my Mom. 

to be continued...

Wednesday Bling

KoyoteKorner

Oh Lord, the jewelry lust just doesn't go away. It goes into remission for a spell. Weeks, months, sometimes a half of a year. That's when I relax for a bit, get some money in the bank, and focus on non-jewelry related matters. But one day I hear it. The soft familiar voice in the back of my head. Reminding me. Must be shiny. Must sparkle. Must have precious, precious bling. When it recurs it comes back with a fury.  

You know what set me off this time? What triggered me? Finding a Mark Chee bracelet in a local thrift store (not bracelet pictured). This is precious bling folks. And it's not cheap. So I've taken to lurking near the store. Drinking unnecessary cups of coffee out front. Peeking in the windows. The vendor knows it's precious. The vendor sees me, loitering in the area. I can't get too close to the bracelet. It's too tempting. Now I see silver everywhere I look. Singing it's siren song, pulling me incrementally closer to a relapse. 

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.

Hilton Head Island

Hi Ya'll. We went to Hilton Head, South Carolina for a week and got a little sun. Matthew's parents have a place there along with the rest of the population of Ohio. In case you can't tell us apart, Ceci is in the black and white polka dots. I'm in the blue and white, and my niece is the rebel in the stripes. 

Doesn't this picture remind you of the poster for "10" with Bo Derek? Or am I the only one old enough to remember that craptastic movie? Of course, Ceci is a thousand times more beautiful than Bo Derek and she would never do white girl cornrows. Over my dead body.

Here's a picture of the most delicious lunch I've had on Hilton Head. A Buffalo shrimp Po'boy with sweet potato fries and coleslaw from Roastfish and Cornbread. Go there as quickly as possible. 

I bet you thought I wasn't smart enough to upload a video. You bet wrong bitches. 

At the salon

Oh my god I just realized I can blog post from my iPhone. I might be able to get back to it. I can't get near the laptop at home without Ceci trying to bang on the keyboard like a demented virtuoso. Anyway I'm at the nail place now. A moment of peace away from the toddler. It would be perfect if I wasn't inhaling chemicals and watching girls with fake coach purses get their acrylic nails fixed. Acrylic nails are like petri dishes of bacteria.

The Evolution of Motherhood

Phase I- I'm not going to give her this orange, because she might choke on it.
Phase II- I'm going to supervise her eating this orange.
Phase III- She's abusing the orange and throwing on the floor, I'm going to take it away.
Phase IV- She's smearing the orange into the carpet and the walls, and I don't give a flying fuck as long as she isn't screaming.

Ceci's Bling

You didn't think any child of mine would go around unadorned, did you? Ceci was gifted this cute cuff bracelet by the fabulous Ryan of Umbilicus Designs. Love it. She shines brighter than the galaxy, folks. It showcases her chubby little wrist quite nicely. Cherubs weep in envy. Of course, she frequently tears it off and "looses" it so I retrace my steps all over town to recover it. But it's worth it. She sparkles and I'm burning calories like mad. 

Things have been quiet here in blogville. I'm finding that living with a mobile toddler consumes all my attention during the waking hours. She has three words- "cat", "wow", and "hi", and between the constant stream of babble she's in constant motion. The girl is off faster than a prom dress. In fact, the only time I seem to have to myself is late at night, when I get home from work. I'm spending the wee hours devouring Prime Suspect on hulu (F*^k NBC for cancelling this excellent show!) and my other new obsession- Pinterest. I treasure the time I have to myself- it seems to be dwindling. Cheers my friends. 

Making Merry

Happy Holidays everyone. We are feeling merry today. It's a rainy, windy Christmas in Bellingham and we're drinking lots of coffee and opening presents.

Ceci was just a wee nugget at this time last year.

Writer's Block

Sorry guys, I don't know what's wrong with me. Every time I think about posting I draw a blank. I guess I'm in a slump. I'm so blocked I'm even having trouble talking about being blocked. Anyhow, here's a pictorial update of our lives- 

Family portrait commissioned by the talented Karie Jane. 

Family portrait in Yellow Springs, Ohio. 

Healthful eating in Springfield, Ohio.

Ceci bathing in her Grandma's old fashioned porcelain baby tub. 

Ceci 12 months ago today! I couldn't resist. 

Birthday Girl

Aloha from Ohio! We're here visiting family and I am finally getting around to posting pictures from Ceci's birthday party. I'm sorry they are so tardy and I'm sorry for my long absence. Unless no one noticed, in that case I'm not sorry. I toyed with the idea of stopping the blog. But that leaves me no outlet for my verbal diarrhea. So here I am. Behold the birthday party!

Guests came over.

Some of them followed my precise instructions "Costumes are encouraged but not necessary". Others ignored these instructions. Some will be punished for their lack of flare. 

The clown pinata I acquired at the Mexican supermarket! 

Ceci's birthday cake!

This was my favorite part of the party. 

The pinata was ugly enough to make children cry. 

Ceci got an obscene amount of gifts. 

Happy family. 

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.

Ceci's Haircut

I'm thrilled about today. I took Ceci to the barbershop and she got her first haircut sitting on my Dad's lap. It was hilarious. My Dad has been talking about it all day. It's funny how babies bring people together. Everyone there was smiling when we left. Tomorrow is her first birthday party. I'm nervous and emotional. This has been the hardest and best year of my life.
Behold, the haircut!

Um, I'd like the extra-large baby cape please.

No babies were choked during said haircut.

Jersey boy haircuts for $12!

Flapping bingo wings free of charge.

Pigtails!

How To Make A Cafe Curtain In Four Short Months, And Other Domestic Tips

Well Friends, Behold the fruits of my labor!

I used Martha's instructions to tackle this project for my dining room window, and four months later, voila! Easy Peasy. In fact, I realized that if I paid myself a fair wage for constructing this curtain, it would have cost me only $100! And that's not even including sewing supplies and fabric. Boy am I proud. The best part is I was able to sew it while Ceci was napping. Well,  she was mostly screaming in her crib, but I like to call that napping. At times I considered going into her room and comforting her, but my heart told me I should finish the curtain. What kind of Mother would I be if I gave up on every little project just because she's crying? She cries all the time, she's a baby for christsakes. Besides, someday she will pass the curtain down to HER children. And they will pass it down to THEIR children. It's basically an heirloom already.
Here's a close up so you can see the fine handwork that went into this product.

Impressive. I know. I'm going to make one for Ceci's room next. The window in her room is twice as large so I think this next curtain will take seven or eight months to complete. But it's worth it. Anything for my precious one.

In other household news, I've discovered the secret to a clean house! Once something gets dirty, I throw it away. Seriously, I finally have a clean house and it feels so good. Sure, I might have to purchase some essential kitchen items and whatnot soon to replace the things I've thrown out. But it's worth it! By not cleaning I've opened up so much time in my schedule for drinking white wine, sewing cafe curtains, self-grooming, and trying Halloween costumes on the baby. It's a win win. We're all happy here. 

Cheers!

This Moment

This moment. A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words- capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Inspired by Soule Mama.