Friday, June 24, 2011

8 Months Old

Our girl turned 8 months old today. I know it's not a year or anything but it sounds so BIG. I can hardly believe it. It feels like last week I was waddling into the birth center desperate to get the nameless, heavy blob out of my body. And now that nameless blob is my daughter. And I am so in love with her I can't stand it. She makes the stars shine brighter. She fills every cell of my body with love.
One thing that keeps me up in the wee hours of the night is this thought- now that I have fulfilled my biologic potential, am I wilting on the vine? I've replicated myself, so now I just need to get her to a point where she can care for herself, and after that I'm just wasting oxygen. Right? Being a mammal with feelings is too much sometimes.
Maybe that's why the Duggers of the world keep determinedly spitting out babies? They might be trying to prove to the boss upstairs that they are not redundant.
Eeek. I've officially given myself the creeps

4 comments:

  1. Happy 8 months to you and Ceci!

    Ugh, the Duggars. When I was pregnant with Violet-I used to watch the show in the morning with the older kids before school (mainly to marvel at-no, to be cruel and make fun of the absurdity of some of their lifestyle choices; but, also to make myself feel better about, oops, having a 4th kid). If 4 kids is insanity, what is a word which means more than insane (you know, for having 19 kids)? Seriously, if children were born as free thinking, willful teenagers (or middle schoolers, for that matter)- you can rest assured that Michele and Jim Bob might have stopped at One.

    Yes, being a mammal with feelings is too much most days. But, you will definitely not be wasting oxygen once Ceci is grown and independent. You will have many stories to tell- many years of advice to bestow upon younger generations. You'll be holding your breath through many of her formative years anyway- you'll deserve to suck in as much oxygen as you can once the good and the bad of those years are past you.

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  2. Good point Amy! She will need years of snarky wisdom in order to develop her own snark. And your 4 kids are groovy. The Dugger's 19 kids not so much. They are most definetly being raised to be soul sucking demons.

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  3. Well said – sometimes being a mammal with feelings really is too much. You are not alone in those thoughts. Every time I find a new gray hair, I realize that I’m actually watching my body decay, which then usually leads to a glass of wine and maybe some M&Ms, because why not? But the reality is that Ceci will need you for a lot longer than she will be willing to admit as a cranky teen. And even later, when she has her own tots? Who will she consult? By then we might all be crones with weird hands like Angelina Jolie, but with luck, we’ll still be a safe haven, with lots of wisdom to share with these kids who will always be our babies.

    Happy eight months to your gorgeous girl.

    (PS: the Duggars offend me on so many levels, not the least of which is hairstyle choice.)

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  4. It goes so quickly, I am always telling first time parents that. They move out of newborn clothes in a matter of weeks! My oldest is going to start school in 6 months and our wee little toddler is almost out of the under two side at preschool. She can't be in the big side yet! She's too small! How did that happen? And before we know it our little 8 week old will be just like Ceci, 8 MONTHS old. No, we are not slowly dying now. You've got to change your whole attitude. We will enter the stage next where we can look after ourselves better than ever. With no babies to tend to you will be free to do yoga and tai chi, take up a time consuming raw food diet with juicing and all that and be healthier than ever as you travel the world with just you and your husband and expand your minds. Or at least that is what I dream about.

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